Woe for a Faerie Page 15

  I swayed. Black spots swirled in my vision until I couldn’t see. Memories jostled against reality. Far away, Arún’s arms caught me and eased me against him.

  The prisoner began a slow laugh. Each peal punctuated the drowning chaos in the void between the before and the now.

  He laughed. Caught and bound, tortured, and the crazed murderer laughed.

  Murderer.

  Her. He murdered her. My beautiful Hannah. The first sweet face innocent enough to see me. Her gentle smile.

  The cause for my choice.

  Vengeance for her death became the reason I rejected my place and threw my wings back at the god that never intervened.

  I couldn’t breathe. For all the wrong reasons.

  Black spots danced at the edges of my vision, and I pulled at the invisible choking fingers of another episode.

  Arún swept me up into his arms and whispered soothing words close to my ear, his gravelly voice the only anchor that kept me from falling over the precipice.

  Just before the darkness swallowed me, a single, frustrating thought formed in neon lights: he saved me again.

  25

  Objection

  Arún

  Woe’s body slept, but her mind did not.

  Her thoughts turned in a whirl that moved in a smear of shadow and hurt and sorrow. Overwhelmed and heartsick, Woe needed a break from the ugliness of reality. Happily, I stepped into my right as her Fae mate.

  I scooped her into my arms and pressed my cheek to hers, free to whisper all the things in my heart.

  In Fae-speak. I wasn’t brave enough to say all the rest in words she might understand.

  Woe melted against me, and my heart merged with hers. If I’d had any doubt before, it was all gone now. I wanted to take her to my parents, to introduce them to her. To tell them my plans and to make them understand that I would never marry a Fae maiden.

  Woe already filled that place in my life. She was mine. I wanted to be hers.

  I carried her out of the dungeon and back into my bedroom in the high-rise in New Haven City. Behind us, the murderer laughed on.

  I kicked the stones apart and the portal disappeared. My bed waited, and I stood for a long time, trembling as I held her. If I deposited Woe in it, I would ask a question of her that I had no right to ask. Much had to happen before we could unite in that way.

  I moved into the living room, to the couch and settled her on the cushions. She shivered, and I pulled a cover over her, drawing on the magic of the Fae realm. My cheeks warmed as the energy rushed into me. Summoning a heat spell, I wove a small one and wrapped Woe in it. She sighed and snuggled down into the seat.

  But perhaps it was time to explain my heart to her, to give her a gift that I hoped would make her happy. It was a present that Ishka had given me to give to her when I met her.

  I wondered when you would give it to her. Ishka’s voice moved through my thoughts.

  It’s not an easy gift to explain, I thought. I am not sure she will understand it. Woe has barely had time to process her new mortality.

  Perhaps. Ishka didn’t sound as though she believed me.

  Maybe I didn’t believe me either.

  When will you bring her to meet us?

  As soon as I am able. That much was true. As soon as Woe gave her permission, I intended to bring her to the Fae Realm as a guest. Not as my mate and not just to visit the dungeon, but to meet my parents.

  I didn’t want to admit it, but a part of me even hoped that she would be impressed by the kingdom I would inherit. I wanted her to favor me.

  At that point, I could use all the help I could get.

  26

  Surrender

  Woe

  When Arún had eased me down, I snuggled into the cushions and pretended to sleep. The mind mush had mostly cleared, but I didn’t hurry it along. I didn’t want to face what awaited. He hovered over me, pacing from my head to my feet and back again.

  Another choice.

  Another life in my hands.

  More responsibility.

  More consequences I couldn’t possibly foresee.

  And the blackened soul chained by vindictive dreams I couldn’t control. Would his death knock the weight off my shoulders?

  Arún laid a cool hand on my forehead and knelt beside the couch. I heard his whispers but couldn’t make out the words. Dunked in an ice bath, stars fell across my thoughts. I stood in a meteor shower. Times a hundred.

  For a moment, I heard his thoughts. Even more startling than being bathed in his magic was the realization that he believed he loved me. With a sigh, he laid his forehead against my cheek.

  I didn’t know enough to love anyone, but I wanted more of Arún. That much I knew. He respected me for me, listened when I spoke. He never tried to control me.

  Jason would not react well, but he didn’t understand how I could do things outside of what he expected or what he called logical.

  That could be a problem.

  I’d gone from one life-changing choice to fifty more.

  And each choice would change whatever came after it.

  Mortality was exhausting.

  And that was the only other truth I knew for sure.

  Next to me, Arún shifted. I opened one eye. The fire had gone out in the fireplace. It hadn’t seemed like that much time had passed. “What happened?”

  Arún lifted his head, and his smile was gentle. “You fainted.”

  I sat up. “You have a prisoner.” The words were a fact, not an accusation.

  Arún wrapped his arm around me and lifted me off the couch. He pressed me against him until we were eye-to-eye. Sharing the same air, we breathed together. His muscles rippled beneath my hands, and he held me there, one arm wrapped around my waist. He had the strength to crush me, yet he chose to be gentle with me. His nearness upended every rational string of words in my head. It would be easy to lose myself in him, to give myself to him.

  Without breaking eye contact, he released his hold so I slid down his body. I swallowed. I didn’t move. Couldn’t move. The warmth in his gaze fastened me in place.

  He said, “I thought my gift would please you.”

  I considered my next words carefully. Arún had killed for me. More than once and without regret. I had no doubt that he would do it again if I asked. The rules he lived by and the rules I wanted to live by were different. I didn’t know what mine were, but they were different.

  The silence was heavy between us. Arún scowled and rocked backward on his heels. “Does it please you?”

  “Arún, I―”

  I swayed as his arms fell away, and the void unbalanced me. I hadn’t realized how much I had leaned on him.

  “This evil creature took part in killing Hannah. He is the last.” He crossed his arms and glowered. “He was there.”

  It wasn’t a surprise, but I couldn’t help a sharp intake of breath. More than that, Arún knew that monster had murdered others. A chilling realization filtered through the heady haze of him.

  I backed away. “Could you have saved Hannah?”

  Arún’s scowl deepened. “The Fae don’t interfere in human chaos.”

  He could have saved her. He had to admit it. I needed him to say it. Intuition without confirmation could be an awful thing. I repeated the question. “Could… you… have… saved… Hannah?”

  His stare was hard as his alabaster jaw worked back and forth. “She was not my concern.”

  Just like that, the bottom fell out of my world. Arún hadn’t cared about justice for Hannah. He’d cared only about convincing me to be his. But only because of a prophecy from a stupid religious system, worlds away. And I wasn’t what he thought I was.

  He could have saved Hannah.

  I didn’t recognize my own voice or the shriek that erupted when I launched myself at him and pounded my fists against his chest. He grasped my wrists while I raved on the edge of insanity. He sank down beside me and wrapped me in his arms. My tears soaked his shirt.

>   Hannah died all over again. Two of us could have saved her. Neither of us did. Why did the grief never let go?

  “Never again. Never again.” I dissolved into tears, and I didn’t care that he pulled me against him and held me while I wept, while I grieved again for a life lost.

  Hours later, all my tears spent, I woke. I must have dozed off in Arún’s arms. My eyes were puffy from crying, and I couldn’t breathe through my nose. But this time was different. I had been cleansed by the grief, purified by the knowledge that I couldn’t change yesterday, but that tomorrow would be different. I had the strength to make it so.

  Without my Fae hero.

  I hoped Jason would allow me to come back.

  Later, Arún snored next to me, both of us stretched out on his couch. The rumble sounded like waves on the beach. It was nice to know that even Fae kings-to-be weren’t perfect. My hair fanned across his face. Every exhale moved the dark strands from one of his cheeks to the other.

  I waited until the next breath out and carefully gathered my hair up. Dragging it across his face might wake him or give him the wrong idea. That done, I wiggled out from between his arms.

  On my feet, I paused to watch him sleep. Grace could be a beautiful thing, and we all needed forgiveness. If either of us had arrived sooner, we both could have saved Hannah, but neither of us had. Maybe we weren’t so different from one another. Time to go.

  When I took a step toward the door, a glint caught my eye. It was the key he’d used to unlock the door to my gift. It lay there, beckoning me forward on my new path.

  Arún snorted and rolled over on the plush carpet.

  I knew what I had to do.

  I tiptoed to the bedroom. How had he made that door visible?

  That’s right―the geodes from the shelves. I counted six. That made it easy. He only used six. When the crystals lit up, it had been in the order of the colors of the rainbow. Easy. Thank god for kindergarten television shows. Hannah had loved them, and I had learned a clever little rainbow song.

  I waited for the despair to pour over me. The hurt was still there, and an ache throbbed in my heart. But this time Hannah’s memory only brought a smile.

  I would do this for her.

  The crystals worked their magic. I was back in.

  He leaned against the old dungeon wall, head lolled to the side, greasy hair across his face. I stepped on a twig and the snap brought him out of his trance. He flinched away and then settled when he realized it was only me.

  He laughed like he’d known all along that I’d be back for him. He lifted his chin and sneered, “Why, hello, queenie.” He wiggled back and forth as he said it.

  This creature was evil. Evil deserved justice.

  But I knew that I wasn’t the one to deliver it. Not today. There’d been enough death. And I couldn’t.

  “How you gonna do it?” His lips twisted as he searched my hands.

  I held up the key.

  His gaze narrowed. Confusion danced in his eyes as he scooted farther away. “What’re you doing?” His evil didn’t understand this mercy.

  I stood over him, this ugly creature. “Hannah loved her life. You took that from her. I loved Hannah. You took her from me.” For a moment, I considered ending his misery, but that would only steal more peace from me. So, instead, I said, “I need freedom from what happened. Today, that means letting you go.”

  He didn’t say anything as I slipped the key into each of the locks that held him. The chains fell away.

  I stepped backward. “Don’t waste your second chance.”

  He groaned when he stood and moved into a full body stretch. He took a step and stared down at the chains as though he expected them to follow him.

  I backed out through the portal. From the room, I watched him spin slowly in a circle as he massaged his wrists. I put a toe on the geodes, ready to kick them apart and shut him out.

  Unblinking, he moved his shoulders back and pressed his chest forward. “You’re a fool. The Boss wants you. She needs a good breeder.”

  “Maybe.” I gave a real smile, one that Jason would be proud of, and drew myself to my full height. “If I ever catch you in my city again, I won’t be merciful.” The warning slipped easily through my lips, and I meant every word. “Good luck.”

  “Until we meet again, Fairy Queen.” A grin spread across his face, and he laughed. The same way he had before.

  I shuddered and then stirred the crystals. The creepy gleam in the black-souled eyes disappeared as the maniacal snigger faded away. I didn’t know how he’d get out of the dungeon, but it wasn’t my problem anymore.

  Back in Arún’s condo, I peeled off my dress and hopped into the shower to wash the dungeon off of me. Arún slept through my hurried exit. I still wasn’t sure if his sleep was real or if he was pretending to save me from having to explain while the re-awakened grief was so fresh. It was the sort of thing he’d do.

  Maybe I wanted him to wake up. Maybe I didn’t.

  After the suds had all disappeared down the drain, I grabbed a pair of sweats and a t-shirt from his drawers. I wondered if all his people slept so soundly. I didn’t know if I could ever be the queen he wanted, but I could be his… Not his queen, not the fulfillment of some prophecy, but his. That, I could do.

  He might be angry when he woke up to find me gone, livid to find out I let the bad guy go. I almost left a note behind, but if he wanted me, he knew how to find me.

  I swiped the tooth mic and the earpiece from the dining room table and let myself out.

  Out on the street, the air was moist with dew. Sunrise pinked the sky beyond the horizon. Jason would be worried. I tucked my earpiece back in my ear and dropped the cap over the tooth.

  I took a deep breath. Nobody was ever ready for a chewing out. “Jason?”

  There were several clicks and a rustling sound. A deep growl, and then a woman’s voice answered.

  “Heya, Wings,” she said.

  I wasn’t sure about the nickname, but I could hear the stranger smiling into her mic.

  It was hard not to smile back. “Who are you?”

  “Vic. The chemist.” She muttered something I couldn’t hear, and then said, “We’ve been worried about you.”

  I didn’t have an immediate answer as I processed her words. Finally, I asked the most obvious, “Who’s we?”

  “Jason, Me, and Lev.”

  “Who’s Lev?” Now there was a third person in the mix? Jason had been busy.

  “Leviathan,” she said. At my silence, she laughed. “Don’t worry. It’ll all make sense soon. Jason hasn’t really been telling you everything.”

  “I guessed that much.”

  “Smart woman,” she said. “Headed in?”

  A gust of wind caught me as I crossed an alleyway. My own place sounded better. “I don’t think so. Not yet.”

  “Good. You’ve probably earned some alone time. I’ll let Jason know you’re okay.”

  “Thanks,” I said.

  “Oh, and Wings?”

  “Yeah?”

  “It’s good to meet you. You’re going to fit right in.”

  I unlocked three deadbolts and slipped into my linoleum-floored apartment. The streetlamps cast unfamiliar shadows across the room. I’d probably been in here all of ten minutes since Jason rented it for me.

  Jason, Lev, and Vic.

  Jason wanted me to choose one side or another, but Vic would be a good person to have in my corner. Maybe even a friend. If I could get along with her. It would be nice to have a friend that wasn’t tall, dark, and handsome.

  I glanced around the sparsely furnished efficiency. A bed in the corner. A table under the lone light fixture. Fridge and stove in the kitchen. I might even teach myself to cook. Maybe Arún could teach me. Spacious enough for me, it wasn’t much, but it was mine.

  This had been the compromise with Jason. I wouldn’t wander the streets and he wouldn’t put me underground. Above me, feet stomped across the floor and a high-pitched voice sc
reeched. Somebody yelled. Neighbors might be a problem here, but it was still better than my other options.

  I heard his wings before I saw him.

  Arún filled my tiny balcony. Until his wings disappeared, he couldn’t turn around. He looked like he’d been stuffed inside a too-small box. Finally, he tapped on the sliding glass door. His expression reminded me of a forlorn puppy. He held a small box.

  I waved him in. “It’s unlocked.”

  With a single movement, the glass door slammed against the other side, and he cringed. Finesse wasn’t his strong suit.

  He stepped inside and stirred the air. My nerve endings tingled. Spells and magic, maybe, but I thought I’d keep him around.

  “You left.”

  “I needed space.” To think. To process. To decide.

  At each thing, he gave an almost-imperceptible nod, as though he heard the list. “That makes sense.”

  “Why are you here?”

  “I have another gift for you. I wasn’t able to give it to you before you left.” His face broke in a smile. “It’s from my sister.”

  “Your sister?” I squeaked.

  His hands dwarfed the small box he held. It was wrapped in teals and blues and purples. A single peacock feather had been tucked in the bow.

  I lifted an eyebrow. “Is it like the other one?”

  His irises sparkled around the eyeshine. “Not quite the same as the last one.” He lifted my hands and placed the box in my palms. His black fire tattoos danced along his forearms.

  I pulled on the bow and the ribbon fell to the floor. I reached for the lid but found Arún’s hands over mine. I glanced up to find him staring intently into my eyes.

  When he lifted the lid, a green glow illuminated his face. A vibration pulled my attention to the bottom half of the box. A tiny figure rested in the gauze. It stretched as though waking from a long sleep and then darted upward. Its wings blurred in a buzz of movement.

  “What is it?” I breathed the words, afraid to scare it away. The green glow darted from one side of the room to another.